Those "articles" and this thread made my day. Hilarious.
I want more.
I think they should try to send her to some community stuff, like a City Council Meeting, the Farmers Market, a Birth Circle meeting, etc.
If she could successfully use the term "indefatigable stimuli" in a piece about a farmer's market then I would take back everything I've said about her.
I have to agree with her about the First Citizens Bank First Down thing though... Lord knows I heard enough of that the last time I was at your place.